Whatsapp
I still remember the first time, my then boyfriend went down on me. He would back then say that he loves eating a woman down there and I am also in the midst of all that embarrassment about my genitals and getting so intimately involved with a man (oral sex is more intimate than intercourse is what I feel). But wait! when he went down, it felt like a random slobbering and lapping of tongues in all conceivable directions as if someone was in a hurry to clean the floor, should guests arrive. Grazing, licking, slurping, tonguing, so many strokes applied one after the other without any rhythm, yeah I wish I had that knowledge back then. Instead I lay there, silently waiting for the act to get over.
As a sex educator I don’t want men to commit anymore cunnilingus disasters on her in the bedroom. So let us learn some basic tips and tricks on how to be the king of cunnilingus aka oral sex on her. Firstly, the definition: Oral sex or cunnilingus involves using your lips, tongue, and breath to stimulate your partner's genitals, and can be an incredibly intimate and pleasurable experience for both parties. But the technique matters.
Oral sex is a skill!
If done right, it can give waves of orgasms, leaving your name constantly on her mind. But if done wrong you have turned her off for the rest of her life. Kamasutra says that a man must be conscious when making love with a woman because his next time with her depends on how his current time went. With the correct techniques, gauging her reaction, and the right tone, oral sex is the key to a woman’s orgasms, if not her heart. Let me tell you how to give her the best sex of her life.
Let’s go down then.
Oral sex aka cunnilingus means stimulating the genitals of a woman using your lips, tongue, and breath. It is one of the most intimate moments that can ever happen between two people in bed, which utilizes almost all of your sensory organs, eyes, lips, tongue and nose, everything working in tandem to bring your lover to heights of pleasure. A clitoris contains over 8000 nerve endings, and you can use each of them to send your partner to heaven.
However every individual's body is unique, and what feels good for one person may not feel as pleasurable for another. Additionally, focusing solely on the clitoris can be a common mistake. While the clitoris is often the most sensitive and pleasurable area for many people, it's important to explore and experiment with other areas such as the vulva, labia, and vaginal opening to find what feels good for your partner.
So if oral sex is such an arousing experience, why is this such a big secret?
There are a lot of answers. Our society often tells us that women’s pleasure is secondary and female genitals are dirty. Often girls are slut shamed for having sexual desires, and are made to believe from a very early age that since this area has menstrual blood coming out and blood is impure and dirty, thus their genitals are dirty and do not deserve respect. Thus many women are uncomfortable receiving this pleasure down there. But most of all, for women exposing themselves in such a way is a very intimate process that makes her feel extremely vulnerable. I mean your face is literally right in front of their genitals.
Initially feeling so exposed can be uncomfortable for her. She will be concerned about the smell, the hair done down there, their inner lips look, their color, among other things. Also, women, on average, need four times longer than a man to climax. Since many women are taught that sex should be focused on male pleasure, the time it takes for them to reach orgasm can cause them to become self-conscious and stressed, not allowing them to relax and enjoy the process.
When it comes to oral sex, one of the most important things you must remember is to keep an eye (or an ear) out for her reactions. This should be the primary guide you follow. Her moans, the way she breathes, her words, will all tell you if what you’re doing is working or not. So, without further ado, here is a six steps guide to give her the best oral sex!
Make yourselves comfortable and communicate:
One of the main problems women face in achieving an orgasm is that they are more concerned about what you are feeling than about enjoying the process. You can free a woman from all her concerns after making her comfortable enough with you. For that, go slow, appreciating every inch of her, especially the parts she is self-conscious about. Your enthusiasm matters! Like you are eating your number one favorite meal in the whole world and it's the slowest most decadent meal you've ever had and you will not whoop it down because it's too good you have to savor it.
Before going down, comfort her. Tell her that you are not in any rush. Make her feel more wanted by complimenting her body, telling her how much you love being with her, and admiring her with your eyes and your fingers. Tell her that she is beautiful, and how you love the way her body feels under your hands.. Caress her and stimulate her erogenous points with kisses. Focus on ridding her of all her self-consciousness about how she should be looking or acting.
Make sure that both of you are in a comfortable position.
Activate her sensuality by touching her entire body
Give her all the time she needs. Rushing towards the main bit can communicate to her that there is a certain urgency in this experience that should be done quickly, making her stressed. Before actually going down on her, you can kiss her neck, play with her hair, touch her sensitive inner thighs, squeeze her butt and play with her breasts. Go slowly, building up anticipation and arousal. Explore each inch of her body with your hands and your mouth before you go to the main event.
Using breath and teasing techniques
Women love to be teased in bed. Go down between her legs and get so close that she can feel your breath on her skin but don't touch her yet. With proper foreplay, the tension and anticipation of this will drive her crazy. There will be a burning desire to be satisfied that feels just out of reach to her until you decide to move closer.
You can stimulate her with your breath without actually touching her. You can breathe or blow lightly on her vulva before you touch her. Experiment by blowing cold air as if you were blowing out a candle, or warm air by opening your mouth and making an 'aha' sound to stimulate her.
Something as simple as pulling her outer lips apart and breathing close into her vulva can be extremely stimulating for a woman as it will tenderly stimulate the nerves inside her. Make sure to remain attentive and watch for any signs of tension or discomfort in her body.
Start with a soft touch
When touching the vulva, remain extremely patient, gentle, soft, loving, and kind. Unlike men, women don't like much pressure on their tender and precious parts. As she gets more aroused, she might ask you for firmer pressure, but always start with a very soft touch. If you are not certain about the level of pressure that you're using, ask for feedback. You can ask simple questions like ‘Do you want me to go harder?’, and with some practice you will be able to understand her needs simply by listening to her breathing and her moans.
Don’t be afraid to get wet
Before going down on her, you have to prepare the entire area. Kiss, lick, and suck on her outer labia first, caressing and stroking them. Then move on to her inner labia and allow your tongue to slowly and lovingly move up and down from her vaginal opening up to her clitoris and back down again. This will make sure she is stimulated enough and remains lubricated throughout the process.
Focusing on just her clitoris or her vaginal canal can cause the body to quickly dry up, turning any pleasure into pain real fast. However there can be situations where even when the woman is fully aroused, the lubrication may not happen. In that case, have a bottle of flavored and edible lube ready by your bedside, that only helps her get wet but also enhances sensations due to the addition of an extra layer.
Don’t forget to have fun
Being playful is very rewarding in terms of orgasms for her. Like, making little circles around her clitoris. This is the most sensitive area of her genital anatomy, so you want to make sure that it is properly activated. How about locking your lips on her inner lips and licking them wet? Making sloppy alphabets and shapes on her clitoris also qualifies as something she cannot resist. In fact, sign your name with your tongue there.
Once she is wet enough, you can explore the entrance of her vagina with the tip of your tongue, and perhaps get inside it. Remember, if you're not having a good time, it's not likely that she is having a good time. Your tongue can get tired, so take a break and stimulate her with your fingers by talking dirty to her. Tell her how gorgeous her pussy is and how much you're enjoying her sweet-sweet taste.
Intensify the sensations for her with the delicious combination of clitoral vibrator teasing her clit and your fingers exploring her vagina. While the nipple clamps tease her with light pinches and pulls, aiding her arousal. I mean who wouldn’t love that?
When engaging in oral sex, it's also important to prioritize hygiene and safety. Using dental dams, condoms, or other forms of protection can help prevent the transmission of STIs and ensure a safe and healthy sexual experience. In summary, oral sex can be an incredibly intimate and pleasurable experience for anyone, but it's important to approach it with sensitivity, communication, and respect for individual preferences and boundaries.
If you further want to bring variety and skill to your oral sex game with some toys but are not really sure where to start, IMBesharam beginner's oral sex kit is your pick. The range of oral pleasure products is versatile and you can use them on your partner or she can use it on herself. It has got a little vibrating tongue ring and gives cool, tingling sensations on her vulva when you turn on its settings. The toy mimics the tongue of a real lover who ensures you cum first. Lots of women have hesitation about how their genitals smell and thus they or their partner feel inhibited on going down. While I am not suggesting that you should be ashamed of your genital smell, its au naturale, however layering it up with a gel that makes your pleasure journey down there all the more exciting and fulfilling is a smart thing to do. The strawberry flavor’s sweetness will amplify the taste of your genitalia engulfing the receiver and the giver in a sea of sensations and stimulations.
Nothing makes oral sex more awkward than a dry mouth so this is the oral lube that is aroma flavored and this one tastes really nice and you can use it on a vulva you can use it on a penis and my favorite thing about lube products is just the process of putting it on your partner i just feel like it's a very intimate thing to do um and it's great for getting yourself and your partner in the mood.
IMBesharam is the leading sex toy company in India. They've been around for over 10 years and have pleased more than 1 million customers. They've got the widest selection of vibrators, anal sex toys, dildos, female sex toys, male sex toys, couples sex toys and more. If this is your first time buying toys, don't worry your privacy is a priority to IMBesharam they've always got discreet billing and discreet shipping .
Remember, eating vulva is an art. With time and practice, you evolve to get better as you start to understand her body better. Remember these tips, do some mouth exercises, and go on a little treasure hunt in her genitals with your tongue, and find yourself with a very happy and satisfied partner.
