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Let’s get one thing out of the way. Porn isn’t bad. In fact, porn is a great stimulator for those lazy afternoons when you feel like you want to be a little frisky. But we get it, if the porn ain’t right then the experience can be a little boring.
Our mind also understands a lot of it isn’t real and sometimes seems very forceful. Not to mention they are made for the male gaze. Sometimes we need laughs, a plot or maybe even some chocolate. A little imagination and expansion of arousal didn’t hurt anyone.
So, how do you get aroused without a stimulant like porn?
For starters, some self-introspection might get things started. Think about what turns you on and gets you all hot and bothered. Is it a sexual experience from a past lover? Is it an old 90s centerfold from an erotic magazine? OR is it that slight hand graze you felt from a person you can’t stand? The choices are unlimited.
Porn helps us get to arousal a lot faster as it exaggerates sexual experiences so do understand your mind is now working backwards and accept that it could take slightly longer - which is just as fun (and worth the wait).
Touch Yourself
Duh.
But not in the obvious region directly. Get to know your body. Feel your neck, maybe your torso, throw in some solo nipple play and see how that makes you feel. Take a video of yourself getting to know your body - the feeling of filming yourself can and will make you feel sexy and naughty. If you decide to share these videos use only encrypted apps. Stay safe.
Experiment with different sensations of touch- feather tickler, ice, warm wax, latex toys and many more.
Create your fantasy world
You are now the writer and director of YOUR fantasy. Close your eyes and think about your kinks, your turns ons and whatever it is that makes your lip bite.
Imagine what you are wearing, where you are, who you are with, and the weather. It’s your story, don’t make it boring, make it exciting for you. Don’t lock away any of your fantasies and don’t be embarrassed by it- it’s your big brain energy.
A Sexy Photoshoot
Grab your favorite lingerie and toy. Take pictures of yourself in a way that no one’s watching - for your eyes only (of course, you can repurpose them later with a partner). Place yourself in a different space and treat yourself as the centerfold of a magazine. This can be sexually empowering and a great turn on too.
There’s no better turn on than…SHOPPING
Explore that rabbit vibrator you’ve been eyeing, and think about how excited you’d be when it arrives. Or even those edible underwear you’ve been curious about. Imagine yourself using the products you’ve added to your cart - nothing like anticipation for the perfect arousal.
Music, Podcasts and Erotica
Nothing like good ol’ smut to do the job. Get on WattPad and play out fantasies between you and your favorite celebrities (there’s one for everyone). Keep your toy on hold, because it’s about to get steamy in no time.
May it be an enemies-to-lovers plot or a gooooood slow burn, reading or listening to erotica will not fail you. It’ll even help you explore your imagination and fantasies. Especially when the plot is with someone whose name you shriek.
Try a remote-controlled toy for situations like these, your hands need to be busy turning pages while your nether regions go on autopilot. Oh, and don’t forget to slap on a sexy playlist to help your rise up to the occasion with a little spice.
Get Your Heart Racing
Yes, while we are suggesting ways for you to do that, sometimes a tiny appetizer to get started would be just what you need. A good workout. It gets your body prepped and your mind energized. It could be a quick 15-minute sexy dance choreography or even a quick run. But your body will be ready to be pleasured immediately.
While exercising can seem like it works it will get your body to be in a relaxed zone. In fact, you might not even need other stimulants to get off after a workout. Just grab your toy and get your body to work on round 2.
Grab Your Phone
But for a different reason, reach out to a friend…to sext. Or a partner. Don’t have either? Look up past sexts. Or we’ll throw you one better, sext yourself. List down everything you would want to do or re-read sexts that made you feel great. There’s nothing like recounting a past sexual experience for a little boost.
So, honey, you can get off without porn. It’s all about your mind. The key is to not limit your fantasies and imagination as they are yours and there’s absolutely no one around to judge you. Take your time with exploration and get into the mood in ways you would imagine.
Hot Tip: If you still need a visual and porn isn’t working out for you. Just log into your favorite streaming site and watch a little bit of Magic Mike or the L Word. But we know you have THAT one favorite sex scene from that underrated show/movie. Nothing like a great plot with hotties to get you started.
