Aili Seghetti, the founder of The Intimacy Curator, and head Intimacy Coach based out of India, shares some of the most common questions she’s asked in her sessions. We went ahead and split them up into three categories, have fun reading!
The most Obvious questions
Is this a Matchmaking Agency?
No, this is not a matchmaking agency - it is a space where we coach people on how to safely explore their intimate-selves. A misconception need to be made clear. I am not a matchmaker and I am not going to find you a partner, neither do I have a database of potential partner nor that is my work.
Let's have Sex?
And yes, of course, people also think that an Intimacy Coach would not only teach you how to be intimate but also offer intimate experiences.
There is an element of touch when it comes to Intimacy coaching, but it's platonic, and that's what is critical for people to understand. We don't offer sex.
How to have sex with sex workers?
Several people end up going to sex workers, but then they realize that it's just sex. There's nothing beyond that. So it comes down to how they can actually approach women and have sex with intimacy.
I can't get it up!
A common problem, where penis-owners are afraid or shy of not being able to retain an erection with someone they are attracted to. This may be a result of either biological issues or problems stemming from their minds.
The most Insightful questions
Virgins and Sex Coaching
It's difficult to work with people who haven't had exposure to intimacy. Besides talking or teaching, there isn't someone they can actually use this training on. Who we can really help is people in relationships, dating, hooking up, but active sexual life or breaks between that becomes important.
Women Talk
There are plenty of women who face problems with being aroused and sex can be painful for some, which eventually leads to problems with their partner. There is a mindset that as a woman, I don't need to be aroused or have sex, it's the man's problem. Women come to me when the man complains of sex, or rather lack it.
It's a social belief that I am here to address.
Do Sex Toys Help?
Sex toys are definitely a way to experience sensation. Using sex toys for women is less of a taboo than actual sex, which I hear a lot. But adult toys are not there to replace human beings, sensations are important with toys to understand - Yes, I feel horny sometimes.
Sex toys are also a great way for you to understand what sensations, pressure, and points turn you on. And the same can then be helpful to pass on to your partner for better sex.
Queer culture
The question that I am often asked by a number of individuals from the LGBTQIA+ is that they feel their sexuality is 'improper' - through intimacy coaching, not only do we learn to be sexually intimate but also walk a path of self-acceptance, self-love and shed our conditioned beliefs. We connect with our innermost needs and desires and become more accepting.
I also get a lot of questions from lesbian couples and many on polyamory and being in open relationships.
The most Unique questions
Mother in Law
Once I had a Mother approach me because she felt there was some sexual troubles between her son and her bahoo. That was a first for sure!
Feet
The role of feet in the Indian Society as a sign of respect has found a lot of takers. You'd be surprised by how common this fetish is in India.
Cuckolding
Way more popular than you'd think. It's the act of you watching your husband or wife or partner, have sex with someone else in front of you, while you only get to watch, not participate.
I want to become a Male Escort
Fine. You want to know how to turn on a woman, how to seduce, yes, we can help you. Then he asked me how to get clients, that's where I had to back down and reiterate that I am not a pimp or a marketing tool.
Aili Seghetti is the head coach at The Intimacy Curator and offers 1 on 1 coaching on a variety of intimacy related topics!