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If your teenage years were spent rummaging through copies of Mastaram and waiting for the late-night edition of Just Mohabbat, then you have come to the right place. If you conveniently swapped through channels while catching glimpses of Midnight Hot on FTV at 9.30 pm, then there are 69% chances that you have done some/all of the below mentioned things.
1. Getting Adult CDs Delivered in Books - Remember the time when you had just dived into the vast and beautiful world of pornography? If you were a 90s kid in India, there sure was no way to stream that over the internet. Here comes that one friend to the rescue. We all had to borrow a book from him and he’d be sure to slip in that precious CD of soft porn in it.
2. Strategic Placement of Channels - There wasn’t a better way to explain ‘a narrow escape’ than when your dad is about to walk in on you watching Baywatch, but you manage to switch channels at the right moment. The strategic nestling of the FTVs and English Movie Channels-between an Astha TV and Discovery, is something we have all done as teens!
3. Friendship Request - What was it before these suave moves to take her out for a dinner or movie? Dress up in your best clothes, try to look cool while doing so, and approach the girl with a lot of courage and ask her to be friends with you.
4. Watercooler by the Stairs - If you didn’t spend some of your school days by the water cooler, waiting aimlessly for an extra glass of water as the ladies took the stairs, you are a nerd. The boring kind.
5. Fantasize About School Teacher - C’mon we have all done it!
6. Discussed The Menstrual Cycle at Length - The only thing more complicated than figuring out how the menstrual cycles work in women is betting money on Dhoni’s overseas form. Only Ramanujam is known to have understood the concept at the first go.
7. Copied a Movie Star’s Hair Style - From John Abraham’s macho look to Shah Rukh Khan’s boy-next-door avatar. We have tried it all in our teens!
8. Used a Movie Dialogue to Impress a Girl - “Hi. I am Rahul. Naam to suna hoga!”- Enough said. (Replace Rahul with your name, and in case your name is derived from a flower, God or dance form- reduce it by half the letters and add an ‘s’”. Like a Champalal Yadav must have said –“ Hi. I am Champs. Naam to suna hoga!”.
9. The First Experience of Buying Condoms - It is very difficult to forget that first experience of buying a condom. 100 bucks says that you bought 5 other absolutely unnecessary things from the chemist before you quickly asked him to slip a packet of condoms in! And the fact that you skipped 5 medical shops to go to the one, where you were absolutely sure there was no chance of bumping into someone you knew!
10. The ‘Non-Veg’ Forward - We will never know how adult jokes got slotted into the category of Non-Veg Humor. But we are all guilty of forwarding an adult joke we lifted from a website (while waiting for the porn to load) or a magazine ( at the hairdresser’s). Which one was your favorite? Now, it’s your turn to pass this article around like a hot potato.
